The Campfire Party

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The cool air of evening surrounded him and Liang absently slapped at a mosquito attacking his leg. Maybe this pair of shorts had been a bad idea. Shrugging, he moved over to the ring of stones and set about creating a campfire. The others were sure to begin arriving any time now. The moon overhead was full and lush. The crickets were chirping and spring peepers were filling the air with their chorus.

Nearby sat a cooler and several bags, packed specifically for this purpose. He had plenty of soda and food for a myriad of guests. He turned his attention back to what he was doing as a lick of flame sparked from the lighter and set the piece of paper ablaze.

It was only a short time before the kindling caught fire, and his sticks sparked into a merry little blaze. He had a larger pile of wood gathered back away from the campfire, to keep it going well into the night.

Nearby a pile of small metal rods with wooden handles rested on a small tray. Liang absently picked one up to test the point on his finger. He had a ready supply of marshmallows, hot dogs, and chips.

A stick cracked nearby, causing him to turn his head towards the noise.

[Sun Quan]

In the East where the darkness lay beaten back by the light of single campfire, there was a horde of gods and men. They wore furs of wild beasts from across the land, eyes of a predator piercing through the darkness with their hunger and lust. The peace and serenity that the lone man had will all change when the Beard Nation attacks. Warriors clad in steel forged by the greatest of Beard Warriors the Dwarves. Beards large and strong on their face. Men from all races and cultures assembled to build their nation. And at the front was the man himself. The Bearded God Emperor! SUN QUAN! His boots ten feet off the ground, eyes glowing with fire, a beard stretching all the way to the ground imbued with life both flexible as a string, but as hard as diamond. Sun Quan using his mighty beard to tread the earth beneath. Behind him was an army in the hundreds of thousands, all indoctrinated to the Beard Nation's cause. For all those under the blue sky must wear a beard. With this goal they have united countless lands, and destroyed resistant civilizations. And within their sights they saw yet another to add to their fold.

Silently moving forth, one beard had hit a stick and violently snapped it. With that Sun Quan raised his arm and with that his army charged. On either side and behind this army were massive giants on either side with a guitar and bass, and behind a massive drum set. They began to play Heavy Metal.

Viking Gods

[Deleted]

The distant rumble, thought to be thunder, cascaded over the clearing. Rumors had been going on for weeks about the Beard Nation and it's mad conquest for control of the world. Now, it seemed, they hand finally arrived. Liang looked on sourly at the ruination of his plans for the evening. No guests had yet to show up and he had to deal with this.

Hand outstretched, Saba flew forward from his pack to slap into his palm. As always, connection with the blade sent a surge of power through him.

IT's MORPHIN' TIME!"

An acrobatic flick of the wrist pointed the blade at the oncoming horde.

White Ranger Power!

Crackles of lightning cascaded across the night sky, sending flashes of light into the eyes of the rushing horde, so bent on their hellish conquest. The surges of lightning sent power rushing through Liang's veins as the armor began to form around him.



Newly formed, the White Ranger could easily make out the distinct form of the Beard King floating above his onrushing minions. Knowing this battle would call for much more of his skills than merely the physical, Liang stretched forth his hand to the heavens.

White Tiger Zord!

A deafening roar, perhaps confused by thunder to his enemies, and the gigantic metallic tiger came bounding across the forest, trees flying to the sides as it came. A powerful leap and Liang was clinging to the side of the magnificent construction, climbing through a port to enter the main control center of the massive Zord.



A flick of his wrist sent the dagger, Saba, stabbing into the heart of the control panel. All around him control panels flicker to life, blinking and displaying readouts of information. A clink of glass behind him as the mystical orbs rolled into place. Yet the zord was made for speed in this mode, and he needed something more.

Saba, Warrior Mode!

The tiger zord began to tremble, even as the nearest members of the horde came within a hundred feet of him. Yet it was already too late for them as limbs shifted and reformed, and the massive metallic warrior stood tall before them, ready to go into battle at last.



A massive blade formed in his hands, 150 tons of metal screamed through the night, the sweep of his blade sounding like the heavens themselves trembling. One swipe and thousands of the now miniscule warriors were battered and cast aside, crushed and broken beneath the simple weight of the massive weapon.


(This thread is about to get a whole lot weirder.)