Journal of Sima Yi

[Sima Yi]

Entry 1, Winter 183 CE

The first signs of of the new season have begun to appear, or so I have heard it said by the traveling merchants who frequent the marketplace. Nature and its cycles have always fascinated me, but winter most of all. Perhaps it is because I see the duality of death an rebirth reflected in humanity. Winter kills all that which cannot survive, only in its place grows another--vibrant and new to continue on again. Human life, being even more fragile than that of a flower, cannot hope to live again when our final winter comes, that is why we must be thankful for families and offspring who will carry on our legacies.

My elder brother, Boda (伯达), continues to bode well. He was always sickly, even when we were young, but his ailments never addled his mind. I am thankful that he was able to marry so quickly, lest he have no offspring. He has frequently pressed me to adopt his two sons--Ziyuan (子元) and Zishang (子上)--but I have respectfully declined each time. Despite my own lack of sons, I believe that he will recover soon and live a full and healthy life.

The studies of my younger brother, Shuda (叔達), continue successfully. His previous tutor was not challenging him enough, but the man was a simpleton, and he was incapable of displaying any true erudition. I have taken charge of his education, but it is unfortunate that my former teacher, Guigu Zi, has departed this world, otherwise I would ask him to teach Shuda. Nonetheless, he has become most able, generous, and well-versed in literature; and has even memorized The Book of Odes perfectly.

When the new season comes I will journey to the west and visit the village of my youth. I know of a man there who dabbles in alchemy, and he may know of a cure for Boda.

Yuan Shao's sycophants were here once again, romping about like dogs, asking after me. I pretended to be afflicted with an illness by using my grandfather's walking stick and acting confused. I do not think I can keep them at bay for much longer, but even a man like Yuan Shao must earn my services.

[Sima Yi]

Entry 2, Spring 184 CE

Earlier this season I relented to Yuan Shao's pursuit of my talents and agreed to meet with him at Ye in Ji Province. I did not hold out much hope that our meeting would be intellectually stimulating, but a man who so earnestly desired my services clearly possessed some clarity of mind.

The northern region was afflicted by several rainstorms, and as a result, it took us two weeks to complete the journey. A more superstitious person would be inclined to believe that the rain was an portent of bad things to come, but I know better than to believe in the suspicions of fools. I was not alone when I met Yuan Shao, for I also met two others. The first was a man named Xu Huang--he is an upright fellow, if a little naive in his outlook on humanity. Irregardless of this, he is not stupid, and I will strive to take him under my tutelage, in which I hope to impart unto him the frailty of humankind. The other warrior was a young woman who possesses extraordinary martial skill and ability. She is allegedly the sister of the warrior Lu Bu, but I can perceive that she will define her own path without the need to depend upon her name.

Yuan Shao was an impressive man, polite and dignified, but he lacked a gifted mind to guide him through the chaos which lays ahead of us. The men who surround him are mean, useless scholars who use lofty words to mask their own mediocrity. I will make short work of these useless men, for this world cannot see a new age with men such as they in positions of leadership. As for the man himself, while my initial appraisal of Yuan Benchu may have been favorable, he is the type to dwell comfortably upon past successes, while hesitant to forge ahead into the unknown.

(To be continued...)